How are you happy all the time? Why do you smile so much when there are many reasons not to smile? How do you stay positive on bad days? These are the questions I've been getting asked for years. I recently had a friend tell me she couldn't stand being around me when she first met me because I was so happy all the time. As she grew to know me she realized she loved me because I lift her up and make her feel her best self. The reason she didn't like me at first was because she was not happy with herself.
A simple not so simple answer to these questions is that I create my own sunshine. Yes, I create my own sunshine. I live in Portland, Oregon the rainy state where you must create sunshine daily within or else this weather can bring you down if you let it. The people you spend most your time with can also bring a damper or light into your life so beware of who you allow in your presence. Protect yourself from the energy vampires who only take from you.
I make a choice everyday which direction I want to go, which thoughts I will feed and with practice I have made this a normal thing in my life. An example of this is a few weeks ago I got stuck on the side of the road because my tire popped. Yes, I'm stressed but I know I will be okay and instead of focusing on the situation I reminded myself that it could have been worse. I spill food on the floor all the time and say well atleast it was not wine or something more difficult to clean up. I do my best to think of a positive outlook in the negative situations. There will always be darkness everywhere you go but YOU have the choice to shine your light from within and say no not today.
(Photo of when I spilled my food at a speaking event. After I had ran in the rain blocks away in high heels to get lunch and then boom it was gone. All I could do was smile, take a photo and laugh at the situation instead of getting mad.)
When you go through struggles yes some days will be harder then others. Some days will be a lot more difficult but you have the choice to change the direction. I will have a series of things that will happen such as getting a parking ticket and then stuck behind a train for over an hour right after but I turn my music up and tell myself today it still going to be a great day. Easy to find negative thoughts slipping into your head so turn them around and fire back with positive thoughts. The more you do this the easier it gets.
Because of my positive happy spirit some find it difficult to believe I have struggles too just like everyone else does in this world. I've had people tell me, "Kayla you have no idea or Kayla you're happy all the time how could you understand anything." Well first off don't ever judge someone else's struggles to your own because you have no clue what someone else is going through or has gone through. I have had the waves in my life and always juggled multiple situations in my life where one of them might be too much for one person. Still though I choose not to wear it on my sleeves. I have taken every failure, every loss, every heartache, every painful situation and turned it into a lesson. A lesson so I can help others who go through something similar and turned it into light so I can lead the light in the darkness for others. Every dark situation makes you the person you are today.
This might sound bonkers to you but it's possible to create your own sunshine and when you do no one can take that from you. This also has to do a lot with your Inner Dialogue a subject I talk about a lot because it's the first step in changing your thought pattern. Be aware of the language you speak to yourself and if you are speaking in a way that you would not speak to someone else then that's something to be aware of. My Inner Dialogue used to be harmful and negative to myself daily. Which led to extremely negative thought patterns in any difficult situation. If you are having negative thought patterns then replace those words with the opposite by using positive words.
I could write an entire book on the importance of Inner Dialogue but i'll save that for another day. Another tip is to set intentions before bed so you can check in with yourself the next day if you are meeting your intentions. Such as today I will be kind to myself. Today I will have thirty second dance party's when I get stressed out. Today I will slow down and listen to my body. Your intentions can be personalized everyday to what YOU need. Check in with yourself and maybe keep that same intention for a whole week or two weeks if it's something you are working on.
When I wake up I tell myself, "Today is going to be a great day." Even if I know I have a stressful day ahead of me I know I have the choice to bring love and positivity into it to make it a little less stressful. Your mindset is powerful and can turn a bad day into an amazing day. I'm not saying everyday will be a beautiful rainbow sunny day but you have the choice to decide, "What kind of day do I want to have today?"
Dance, move, follow the things that bring you joy, listen to your intuition, speak your truth, set intentions, check in and surround yourself only around people who bring love and light into your life.
CREATE YOUR OWN SUNSHINE
