What I learned in 2017
2017 was a magical year filled with tragedy, love, growth and inspiration. In January I was still struggling with my break-up that ended up being the best thing for me. I was able to pick up my broken pieces and rebuild a stronger version of myself. I learned that I did not love the parts of me he loved and I needed to learn how to love those parts too. I learned that I can love someone deeply but not hurt from them anymore because I complete myself now.
I followed my passion of going to medical school but found out I do not want to be a doctor. Still I finished the medical assisting program even though it was difficult being in night school while working three jobs. I had my first office job learning about health insurance, how to use a mac computer and handle lab work. Nine months later I realized I need a job where I'm moving my body so I got over my fear of public speaking and became a fitness instructor. I began to speak my truth and say what I feel in the moment.
I finally called myself a Self-Love Coach and impacted a large amount of humans. I watched people grow and realize they are enough just the way they are. I watched people find themselves and where they belong in this world. That to me has been the most magical part of my life. I realized the world and everyone in it can use more love in their lives.
I stopped using heat on my hair (I had my hair curled almost everyday for seven years) and wearing make-up to prove to myself that I do not need to do anything extra to be beautiful. I started embracing who I am fully and loving myself more then I ever have. I found my tribe of the most loving genuine humans who let me be myself fully and inspire me daily. I became an apprentice for a food wizard creating the healthiest, vibrant, delicious food. I lost two loved ones to suicide in April and lost my saint-bernard in the same month. I was awakened where I serve a deeper purpose in this world. I'm doing my best to turn my pain into love for others.
I met the coolest lady on a plane who is now one of my good friends and we record self-love podcasts talking about the things that need to be talked about. I traveled a lot with my best friend Lucy and we both followed anything our hearts desired. I traveled to Taiwan alone to visit Jessica which was my first time out of the country without someone with me. I got five meaningful spontaneous tattoos and now have seven. I connected with powerful inspiring people who are helping my dreams come true daily. I did anything in the moment that lit my fire.
I met incredibly talented musicians and fell in love with one of them for a short period of time. I learned that I am capable of feeling for someone again and went on tour with him which was incredible. When we broke it off I was okay because I complete myself on my own. I slowed down a lot on my drinking and became okay with staying in on the weekends instead to read, write, paint and relax with my labradoodle. I learned to slow down and listen to my body. I finally reached a point in my life where I embrace myself fully as I am and I'm meant to be. I realized I am enough just the way I am and I don't want to be anyone except myself. I binged less this year then I ever have since having my eating disorder. I realized I will forever have an eating disorder and i've excepted that because I now have the tools to make the choice that needs to be made everyday which direction I go.
I've changed the language in which I speak to myself and am kind to myself. I recognized where there is light there will be darkness so prepare yourself. I ended my year with amazing friends in California and it was the first new years day that I was not hungover and was able to enjoy my trip fully in the sunshine.
I learned a lot in 2017 but to some it up I learned more where I serve my purposes in this world. I learned to stand up for what I believe in and to always speak my truth no matter what. I learned to live in the moment because we don't know what tomorrow brings or the next five minutes.